2/27/2017 0 Comments ivf #1 failI've tried to write this post so many times. What to say? How to say it? How honest should I be? I struggle with an anxiety disorder and the worst thing for someone with anxiety is uncertainty. We live in one of the most uncertain times ever. Politically, societally, everything is uncertain right now. Anything could happen. It is a scary time to be on the crux of anything especially if you have studied history and can see the glaring similarities between our present situation and, say, the 1930s.
This is also the most uncertain time in my life. A time where I feel absolutely out of control. I think any bad diagnosis will do that. I read somewhere that those struggling with infertility suffer the same amount of stress as cancer patients. I don't know if that's true, but it doesn't feel good. It's crushing at times. You see, in my younger days I would have checked out of this scenario months ago. I'd have moved country or at least city. I'd have started anew. Now I'm married and the geopolitical situation isn't so hot and I bought a house right before I lost my job and I need medical treatment and I am forced to deal with the situation I'm presented with. No shortcuts, no running away. Just staying and dealing. Maybe that in itself is a gift. Maybe that is the lesson. I'm in the country that others are trying to run to (lucky) and I'm okay. There is no flight so I am left with fight- it's all I have. I don't have a baby. Yet. But I probably will. I have options. We have options. We'll see the doctor tomorrow and see what she says. I don't know if we can do this again.
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AuthorCall me M. The About page should lower those expectations of yours. Archives
November 2017
CategoriesAll Celebrities Clomid Femera Fertility Hormones Infertility IUI IVF Male Infertility Mental Health Mindfulness TWW |